...to spend 6 hours in a car with on the way to Mammoth!
We have all been there. Offered an extended car ride to somebody only to immediately regret that decision at the first stop light. Seeing as how Southern California is the place where 85% the shred media and companies reside, I thought this would be a perfect length ride to make judgement calls. A ride to Mammoth from San Diego/Orange County is an ass numbing 6 hours no matter which way you slice it.
Top 5 who don’t get to come:
1.Lucas Magoon -Don’t get me wrong, the Gooner is a gem. I love this kid and everything he stands for and slides under. However when sitting in a car for an extended period of time you have to consider not only conversation, but also personal hygiene. I don’t know what Lucas smells like up close, but based on my observations it would be a mix between some sticky icky, a wet ashtray, and one of my grandfathers shoes…and probably throw up.
2. Jamie Anderson– Don’t fucking talk to me about crystals and your spirt animals. The second you got in the car, the smell of essential oils essentially made you a hitchhiker.
3. Red Gerrard– It not just Red, its pretty much anyone that is under 18. You are all just emojis, hormones, and annoying music. You could however, ride in the trunk…rolled up in a throw rug.
4. Todd Richards– Fuck that dude. Could you be more irrelevant ? What are you like 75 now?
5. Chris Grenier– You can take the Masshole out of Massachusetts…Every time I see this kid he is either talking about fellating Tom Brady or getting railroaded by convicted murderer Aaron Hernandez. The only thing good to ever come out of Massachusetts is that video about the guy in Boston Harbor catching a baby whale.
We all have to pay for gas to get where we need to go, but if any of the people on this list need a ride, driver be warned.