Relief: You can now buy your Tesla!

And your friends can come along! Step on the prissy pedal!

Tesla makes a very sexy car don’t you think? Oh of course it is no Porsche but sexy nonetheless and their sexiest model is Model X, the company’s sport utility version. You could pack your four best friends in, gas free, and take off to the mountains for a wonderful snowboard adventure.

Just kidding! The Model X sports the greatest gullwing doors that remind of Back to the Future but also make racks an impossibility. So at least two of your best friends can’t come and will spend the weekend posting rude messages to social media.

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#dicks #ihatemyfriends #assholes #etc

Elon Musk though realized the error of his ways and Tesla just released a snowboard rack that snaps onto the back!

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#sweethearts #ilovemyfriends #zeroemissionfun #etc


Rotation: Surfers are math-tards!

Even after all these years, the basic rotation is a vast mystery to the surfer mind.

This video just came out of this surfer doing a 720, yet they call it a “double spin.”

Then when they’re talking about it, or writing about it, the surf dudes keep calling it a “540.”

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DUDES!

That makes no sense! First of all if it’s a double spin, that right there is inferring that it’s a 720. Also, like this move has been done on skateboards and snowboards, so why is it a 720 on a snowboard or a skateboard, yet a 540 on a surfboard?

I don’t want to take away how insane this shit is that this dude is doing, but like, why do you surfer bros keep fucking up rotation names? A wave has transition and it’s like a 1/4 pipe, so name your rotations as such.

It’s not rocket science.

Well maybe it’s like very very basic rocket science in a sense, but still. Get it right surfer bros!

Here is a backside 540…

And here’s a backside 720…

And now you know, bro!


Gimme: Lib x Mayhem Rocket!

It is hard to imagine a more perfect union!

I only ride one surfboard and it is shaped by the hand of Matt Biolos. He is a master. An artist in his prime. And have your snowy ears heard his name before? Oh but they should have! He’s also been designing snowboards alongside the masters at Liberace Technologies for some years now.

And now Lib x Lost have just released the Rocket. I surf a rocket. Now I want to snow one too. This is a collaboration I stand fully behind. It is not Burton x Grateful Dead or Burton x Phish.

It is cool x cool.

Gimme Bad Santa. Gimme now.


Who need snow when you got Buffalo?

Colorado is totally snow-less but you think anyone cares? It's Saturday and the Buffalo are roaming!

There is like no snow at all here in Colorado but do you think anyone even cares bro? Do you?
Hellz no! The Buffs are making it rain and the people are looooooooooving it!

Can you say “Pac-12 Championship Game?”

Can you say “College Football Playoffs?”

Can you say “Stampede the Tide?”

Yeah?

Yeah!

The state hasn’t been having this much fun since Coach McCartney was struttin the sideline.

Colo-rad-bro!

Come for the snow. Stay for the Buffalo.

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How to: Get a bad case of poison oak!

Who needs snow when you gots the itch!

Do you dislike your snowboard? Do you like to get poison oak or poison ivy and get very itchy? Do you like scratches all over your body? Do you dislike the snow? Do you like the smell of rotten leaves? Do you live in a place where it hasn’t snowed yet but gots your new board all ready and can’t wait to get rad?

Then do this!

Mission: shred from Mikhail Potemkin on Vimeo.